All I Want for WWDC Is My Two Front Teeth

Everybody Pauses and stares at me
These two teeth are gone as you can see
I don’t know just who to blame for this catastrophe!
But my one wish on WWDC Eve is as plain as it can be!

– from “All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth” (slightly modified)

This is the wishing season, a lot like Christmas. All of us Apple users and developers sit around the computer screen (or in person like I did last year) on Monday morning of WWDC waiting to hear from Santa Claus… err, I mean, Steven P Jobs… about what goodies are in store for the Mac and iOS operating systems for the next year.

Procrastinators sit around talking about what we will get like parents talk about this year’s hot new toy: enhanced notification, the end of syncing our devices via a desktop computer, music in the cloud. Usually Apple pulls some goodies out of the bag that no one has heard about but will turn everyone’s head, too. (Cabbage Patch dolls!)

But I have to admit that the more I think about all these other things, the one I want more than any other, the one no one else is talking about, the most mundane of the bunch, is improved auto correct. Personally, I’m tired of having to re-read every email I send out for Apple-corrected grammatical errors and tired of the fact that I type a hundred times faster than the auto-correct can keep up. I’m tired of the capital letters in the middle of sentences, tired of Apple deciding every time I mean apples I really mean Apple’s, tired of the word its always being “corrected” to it’s. I’m tired of auto-correct being needed 100% of the time, it being right 80% of the time and horribly wrong the other 20%, a very un-Apple like lack of perfection.

But most of all, I’m tired of being embarrassed by the Apple-induced spelling and grammar errors. It’s almost as if I lost my two front teeth.

2 thoughts on “All I Want for WWDC Is My Two Front Teeth

    • I wish it were that simple. The problem is it works well 80% of the time. The capitalization, too, is frustrating but works 80% of the time. To quote a Muppets Movie song, “You Can’t Live With It, You Can’t Live Without It”!


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